Soy sauce

Liza: My results came back and my haemoglobin count is really low. The doctor is recommending an iron infusion

Stuart: Ah, ok. Be sure to stay away from magnets

Liza: [What a great dad joke] Haha!

– 7:42 pm

I could hear your mother coming down the stairs and had to open another tab (to conceal this one). This site and entries are still very much a secret you see. And I plan on keeping it that way for as long as possible.

She looks like she’s been sleeping for a couple of hours, and she has. For no explicable reason, we got up really early today, around 5 am. And when I’m up, I’m up, only night will take me down. We’ve since walked to Kingston and back with some fresh bread (from Olivier), a new perfume for her and some cheese from the Surbiton Farmer’s Market. There were two pitstops, the first at Ginger Bees Café for her (vegan salted caramel) ice cream and oat milk cappuccino, and at Local Hero where we normally brunch but only used the bathrooms this time. It was a great day to catch sunrays on a bench.

I got into the car after the Man City (2), Liverpool game (3) game. O’Yes, we bought a new car. Unlike my BMW M Sport which I now have to sell, it’s one with four doors and enough room to ram half your shit in. We picked up the Ioniq 5 on Thursday. So I spent (way too much) time in it trying to figure out what all these damned buttons and settings are for.

Liza’s bloodwork came back with worryingly low haemoglobin levels, which explained the constant fatigue and tiredness. So her doctor recommended an Iron Infusion. When she told her old previous boss Stuart about it, he made the “magnet joke”.

Your mother just interrupted – again, had to hide my work – to suggest we do a court marriage before you’re born… Let’s ice that for now.

Yesterday, we left the house at 9:30 am for Portland Hospital. There was no fuss about our slightly late arrival. The nurse was ultra nice and got us comfortable in a room.

A doctor came in, walking somewhat hastily. I couldn’t be certain through her face mask but she didn’t appear as jittery and overworked as I’d imagined or anticipated. The impact of the pandemic on healthcare professionals has been clear for all to see. But she seemed awake and capable, which was a relief. It sounds ridiculous I know. She rustled through some packaging and got an IV ready, complaining about the amount of waste as she ripped through plastic after plastic. I asked what was stopping her from solving this problem through a business. “Nothing”, she said. I emailed the address she gave me so let’s see if she replies. In hindsight, I doubt she has the time or the headspace.

Your mother squirmed and looked away the entire needle process, as expected.

Drip, drip, drip, the soy sauce went into her veins. Lizzie, the nurse, stayed for what became a free-flowing and extremely enlightening conversation. In between her forms, we spoke about topics I condensed into “the life and work of a creative”. Most importantly though, she used to work for the NHS and helped set us straight on some medical decisions your mother and I had been on the fence about regarding your birth. We now know what we need to do. It’s going to break the bank but it’s a long-term investment in yours and our futures.

It wasn’t immediately apparent but by sundown, she looked ready for a triathlon, buzzing with energy. I wonder if you felt any of it. You must have. She had Sauti Sol coming through the speakers, bouncing away. I wish I had a video. But it was great to see.


Time flies by when you’re laughing. And in no time at all, the hanging bag was empty. Within a few bright smiles and goodbyes, we were out on the street. We sauntered around the city, opting for the quieter Marylebone. She had lunch at 31 Below, where I had an iced Americano.

Work in progress

– 4:56 pm

Last Friday, I went to the hospital because my wound was producing a yellow-greenish discharge. An infection yes. This was days after the surgery sutures were removed and replaced with paper ones. That’s most likely how it happened, during the swap. So the wound was swabbed and redressed. Mr Culpan also prescribed some antibiotics. I completed the dose yesterday and the discharge has since stopped. But he wants me in Monday to ensure there are no visible signs of a lingering infection.

I feel like I’ve spent more time in hospitals the last few weeks than I have my entire life. And with your due date fast approaching, I imagine I still have some way to go before they see the back of me.

The next day, on Saturday, your mother and I had to get her another Ferinject infusion. Her haemoglobin count had dropped again, so much so that, she needed another drip of iron. We met a different nurse and a Spanish female doctor this time around at Portland hospital. I don’t recall their names. But they were equally nice and professional. We performed our ritual of getting Crosstown doughnuts on the drive home.


As we took a left onto Alpha road, your mother went, “Oh, I forgot to tell you but I thought Lian would be a good name”. “It’s also the second half of yours”, she explained. I like it (whether it carries mine or not). So, as things stand, your name is Lian Tawa(nchambi) Ateh.

Your mother spent Sunday morning grouping your clothes together, all the gifts you’ve received, piling them up by style. When she had them neatly tucked away in bags, we got onto PatPat to order the missing bits, well in advance, just in case shipping was delayed.


We had lunch at Hideaway earlier today by the river. From there, we drove to John Lewis to get a hands-on view of the latest Snuzpod4. It’s a height-adjustable bedside crib. Besides where it’ll go, I don’t have a problem with it. So it’s likely we’ll buy that and a changing station to complete the core of things you’ll need during your early days.

Since we got back, Liza’s been complaining of pain in her pelvis and tailbone. I had to get off the phone with Manu to check up on her, crutches in one hand and hobbling on one foot up the stairs. I just gave her a second paracet and a hot water bottle for her lower back. Here’s to hoping the Magnesium oil I rubbed in also helps.

There’s a very good chance she’s got COVID. She attended an offsite in Paris where more than half the attendees have since tested positive for the disease, including people she sat close to. She’s still testing negative though but I think it’s inaccurate.